My daughter had gotten out of bed for the 4th time that evening. She thought it was a game. How far down the hallway can I make it before Mum or Dad sees me? Then when they do, how fast can I run back to my room before they catch me? This is an ‘game’ we play EVERY DAY!
I ‘caught’ her and got her back in bed, tucked her in. Gave her a hug and kiss. I asked her if she knew what time it was, and in her sweet little voice her reply to me was, “I’m driving you crazy!”. SMACK!!! I felt like I had been slapped across the face.
I assured her that she wasn’t ‘driving me crazy’ (yet) and that she needed to closer her eyes and sleep.
I walked out of her room and said to my husband, I think I really need to watch what I say to the kids and how. I don’t think they understand my sense of humor yet. I told him what she had said. “Ho did you like looking in the mirror?” was his response. That stung too. I went upstairs replaying in my mind all the things I say to the kids and how I say them.
I don’t want to lie to my children about how I’m feeling, but I don’t want them to feel like they can’t express themselves either. It’s delicate line. I suppose I’ve been playing with fire without even knowing it. My kids need to know that there actions affect how others feel.
I don’t want them to feel sad or mad at themselves either. Sometimes I do say in a moment of frustration, “You’re driving me crazy!” I don’t mean it in a bad way, I’m just saying the truth. My tone isn’t hateful or angry. It’s not even directed to the children, I’m just saying words. But they don’t understand that.
Kids are little mini versions of us. They watch your every move, they listen to your every word (when you think they aren’t). My encounter with ‘the mirror’ could have been worst, could have been better. It was LARGE dose of reality.
I felt a little like the evil step mother from Snow White, peering into her mirror.
Mirror, mirror on the wall…
I suppose we all have our mirror moments and when we least expect them too. I definitely wasn’t expecting a reality check from my daughter. But now that I’ve had a few days to ponder over it, I’m glad it happened. Now I can fine tune my mother’s skills. Maybe count to 20 instead of 10 before I speak.
Have you had ‘mirror moments’ with your kids? Or partner? Anyone really? What did it make you realize?