The other day I did not feel like Super Mum, I felt more like Failure Mum. It was a bad day.
My son refused to sleep the night before. My dog wanted to add to my exhausted state and my poor daughter was trying to sleep, couldn’t because of all the noise that was going on at 2:30 am. To top it off my husband was at work, so it was just me.
I knew I was going to be exhausted the next day, not much I could do about that, so I tried to push it out of my mind. My daughter crawled into bed with me at 5:30 am, usually I get up and put her back to bed but this was her lucky day, I was way to tired to lift my head. I just opened the blankets and let her in.
I managed to get my son back to sleep at 4:30 am – this is very out of character for him. He normally sleeps through the night, so I didn’t know what to do. I tried, what felt like, everything. Singing. Rocking. Rubbing his head. Talking to him. Changing him. I put on a nightlight, his white noise machine. He wasn’t teething. He just wanted me to hold him. I was so tired and I just wanted the crying to stop, I picked him up. Which I never have to do. He continued to cry. He wasn’t hungry. He was exhausted but just wanted to cry.
The crying was getting to me. So I put him back in his crib, calmly as I could told him that it was bed time and he needed to close his eyes. I backed out of the room slowly and listened to him cry. I give him 10 minutes and if he was still wailing away, then I will go back in and repeat.
9 minutes had passed… the time on the clock 4:29 am. If he is still going, I am going back in, I told myself. Then it was silent, he stopped. He had gone back to sleep.
Quick! Fall asleep as fast as you can.
Fast forward to morning time. My daughter is still working on potty training. We have good days and bad days with it. I could hear her stepping in what sounded like a puddle in the kitchen. Son of a….! She peed on the floor and was jumping in it.
I was down on my knees, cleaning up the 3rd accident of the day, when my daughter started in with the “I wants” and “Mum, Mum, Mum…” I lost it. I broke down. Couldn’t she see I was cleaning up another accident. Couldn’t she see that I was exhausted because I hardly slept the night before! I wanted to yell back, ” I WANT SOME SLEEP”, but instead my tear filled eyes met hers, I didn’t say a word. All I could do was cry. Her little hands held my face and she said, “It’s OK Mommy, it’s just pee. I help clean up too.”
Yes, it was a bad day but I (& my husband) must be doing something right. My 2 year old daughter can see when I’m having a bad day. She wants to help and make everything all better. It’s moments like this that make parenting worth it.