I have never really been good with rejection. I have never been the best with dealing with the horrible people in the world, who only have negative things to say. I don’t think that anyone is really equipped to deal with personal attacks. Some may hide it better than others, but on some level it still hurts everyone.
Unwanted “advice”, disguised as nasty comments. How I choose to feed my child, that is my business. I am learning to deal with these comments so much better as a Mum now that I had some life experience.
When I was a young girl, there was this women in my life who was as fake as they come. She would be all sunshine and rainbows when there was a group of people around. However, the minute they left, or were out of ear shot, she was bitter, negative and cold person. The words that left her lips in private were terrible. They cut me deep, then when you think the verbal terror was over, there would be one last thing and that would sting horribly. Worst than everything else combined.
I didn’t think anyone would believe me if I told them because I was ‘just a kid’. For years, I kept my mouth shut. I did my best to shield my sister from it until I could no longer take it.
I told someone and they believed me.
Fast forward to years later, I would have been maybe about 14 years old. This person had pulled the last straw. I finally confronted her with how I felt. How much she had hurt me with her negativity.
After years of ‘lessons learnt’, profession help, talking about the crap that I was put through, I finally understand that it wasn’t my fault for any of what happened in the 10 years this person was in my life. Because she was unhappy, she found it easy to take it out on everyone else.
What’s that saying, misery loves company?
But me, I choose to be happy. Yes, choose! It’s a choice you make. Happy or sad. Bitter or sweet! It’s too easy to fall into someone else bull shit. It’s too easy to miserable. Life is short, I choose to be happy. Life is better that way.
It must have been in my early 20’s that I started cutting the negative people in my life out. One by one they left. I just didn’t have time for this, I mean honestly who does?
Do you know what I discovered? I discovered happiness! I discovered that it’s so much healthier, easy, and FUN to be happy. People want to be around you. When you’re happy and you drop all the negative, condescending B.S, things happen. Positive things happen. Because I cut out the negative, toxic people in my life, I found the best sort of happiness. I found my husband and together we have two amazing kids.
Rather then be angry and upset with this women, I have come to terms with what had happened. I don’t regret what happened because it has equipped me with tools I need to deal with and handle the negative people that I still experience in my life. It has also brought me to where I am today and I wouldn’t want to be any where else. Now, don’t get me wrong, I have the tools and some knowledge to deal with the negative people in my life, doesn’t mean when they decide to open there mouth and speak hurtful words that it hurts less. Hurts just as much.