It seems to me that just as I am getting my balance, a strong wind comes along and blows me over again. I forever feel that I am being knocked over, wiping off the dust and getting back up again.
Once my husband got home from his sail back in Nov/Dec, Christmas then came (sigh) that is always a very busy time. Throw a toddler in the mix and you’re at the circus. Staying other people homes, people staying in your home, not sleeping in your own bed, its a balancing act to keep it together some days.
Well, I thought that I had my balancing act together, then that wind came along. This time in the form of a crazy broken up, no rhythm or reason sailing schedule. I now see the next 5 months of ‘Where’s Daddy?” and count downs until Daddy is home. I imminently thought the worst. I was overwhelmed with ‘what ifs’. Half way through a thought, I said to myself ‘Stop it, what are the positive things?”
Scarlett and I get to bond. We can eat KD (total weakness of mine). Dinner in blanket forts. I will become stronger. Scarlett will become stronger. We can surprise Daddy with our amazing cooking skills. This is an opportunity to shine!
I reflected on the horrible, yet very educational experience I went through last time my husband was away. What were my weak points? What caused the most stress (other then the obvious of my husband being away)? I was going to come up with a game plan, and that’s just what I did. I took my positive thoughts and came up with a plan.
I wanted to find my balance. I think Scarlett deserves to have a Mum who is happy and fun.
I started with the item I have absolute most difficult with (as you may know) cooking is my kryptonite Ugh. Despise it. This is where my husband comes in to my plan.
Food plan. My husband is going to put a few different dinners in the freezer so that the days where, the patients is gone, I can pop something in the oven and be done with it until that wonderful buzzer goes off. I am also, going to cook along side my husband, he is an excellent teacher, so that he can show me the ropes. Fingers crossed this will help me feel more comfortable in the kitchen. And of course, my best friend the slow cooker will come out of retirement. It’s a loose plan, but it’s a plan.
When I feel like I have no control over situations, that is when I am at my weakest.
Motherhood, I am learning is all about finding your balance faster, and more often. It’s not something I am going to learn in 2 years, it may not be something I am going to learn in 10 years but I am learning. I can’t having everything the way I want it. I can learn to take a deep breath, see the positive in the situation, that is my balance.
My bosses are amazing people. Parents too, so they get it. They are accommodating and give me wonderful advice (even when I don’t ask for it). They understand that it’s only a temporary situation (my husband being away). They know that I will go back to regular tasks in a little while. They keep the stress to a minimum and for that I am grateful for that.
1.an even distribution of weight enabling someone or something to remain upright and steady.
My goal is to stay upright and steady!